I want to be organized. Really, I do.
But I’m not.
It’s very frustrating to recognize this character flaw of my own and be unable to break the loop. I try. Try my butt off to keep things in order, easily found and ready to access. However, I can never seem to pull it together.
Case in point:
I lost my comedy notebook recently. I don’t know if it’s misplaced, or I left it somewhere, or what. The problem with this: I hadn’t written down a lot of ideas I’d been kicking around on stage in the past couple months, and when I finally said “Okay, let’s do this,” surprise! My source of organization has gone missing. Most days, my pockets are filled with tiny scraps of paper that have half-finished thoughts. Thoughts that I write down, saying “I need to put this in my notebook. This time I’m going to do it.”
And then I don’t.
I’ve been working on other projects lately (improv, sketch, getting my TALK SHOW off the ground [more info about that soon]) and have been lax in writing new stand-up material, and need to explore some ideas on paper. Now if only I had those ideas somewhere…
I have a day planner. The ladyfriend was gracious enough to give me one as a gift. It has two months of information in it, and then nothing. Why? I keep INTENDING to write shit down, and then don’t. It’s like there is a wall that falls down between all of my synapses and disables my ability to actually allow myself to be organized. Lifehacker seems like a great site for this stuff, but again. No long-term implementation. Does this happen to anyone else? It’s really frustrating.
I’m not even going to get into what my desktop looks like, virtual and actual.
I want to push to accomplish my goals, but how can I when I wind up being my own worst enemy most of the time?
Someone please help me not be an embarassment to retarded people.
-MAL