Hello again, from the greatest show on silicon, The Week That Was. Every week, I wait until Friday and panic and write a few jokes I cull the news for stories that deserve to be skewed. And then I do it. Like I’m a kebab-man. Kebabman.
Let’s begin!
The San Antonio Spurs won the NBA Championship, making this team the fourth most-boring team to win a major sporting title. The top three? The other three times the San Antonio Spurs won the NBA Championship.
Kelly Clarkson was forced to cancel her upcoming summer tour due to low ticket sales. In a related story, Justin Guarini is still available for birthday parties and bar mitzvahs.
The Sopranos ended its long run on HBO this week with a rather abrup-
Lou Perelman, the man behind such groups as *NSYNC and Backstreet Boys, was arrested in Asia over charges of bank fraud. Perelman is charged with bilking millions of dollars out of the pockets of people with poor taste in music.
Gay marriage will continue to be legal in Massachusetts after a judge upheld the Wicked Fucken Queeah Act of 2004.
Nicki Hilton is upset with people saying that her sister is in jail for drunken driving. Said the heiress: “she is in jail serving karmic debt.”
AND FINALLY…
Texas authorities have arrested 7 sexual offenders by using data gathered from their MySpace pages. Police were tipped off when the suspects, under “Hobbies,” had all listed “Touching Children I Meet on the Internet.”
Have a great weekend.
-MAL
